Brevity: The Soul of Wit

As someone who loves writing, humor, and humorous writing, words captivate me.

There is so much power in a thought, which becomes an idea, crystallized through a word. It has the power to heal or kill; to comfort or distress; to make you smile or cry. Some people use them on blogs with very few readers to try and generate a laugh.

Some people.

Brevity is the soul of wit. I have heard this quote used often in discussions about humor.

Brevity is certainly not my strong suit. I am known for rambling, going off on tangents and just generally talking to hear the sound of my own voice, yet, somewhere the reader finds humor (not here though, this is serious business).

This is what fascinates me: when correctly applied and considered, words can be the strongest tool for humor. When careless about them, unneeded words are an anchor tied around the neck of a joke.

Anyways, I was just thinking about how funny it is that the quote is the way it is, when 'Brevity: the soul of wit' is so much... punchier.

...I apologize for nothing.

Oh God, How Did I Forget To Come Up With A Title

This whole blog situation could quite easily be titled 'Tracking how much free time psolms has: An in depth look at his employment situations by blog post dates". Needless to say, looking for work as a freelance web developer is terribad.

As an aside, Freelancer is a word that sounds like it should mean something so much cooler than it does.

Last weekend, I had a blast from the past as I cruised through my old music (check it out here if you really like me) and I got pretty inspired to create more, so hopefully I'll have some new music to display in a short time.

My digital footprint is so fractured: I can count on one hand the number of friends on facebook who follow me on twitter (and on one finger the number who also read this blog). If I planned to be committed to blogging in any capacity, I might consider cross-pollination, but I just so much doubt the level of interest from people I know.

I really love coming up with the tags for these posts, but I think pretty much every post I have made has had the 'word vomit' tag... I'm not sure what that means. If you're reading this, do you find my disjointed style of puking words interesting, or infuriating? Let me know in the comments! (haha see what I did there with the call to action)

Linkstorm: Twenty Oh Eleven

So for quite a while (between my 2nd last post and my last post) I've been unsure as to the purpose of this blog. Is it for comedy? A personal platform for political persuasions? An awesome auditorium for alliteration?

Man, I dont need your labels. This is whatever I want. I'm not a part of your system.

So anyways, for a while, I was gathering links to stories and articles that had some political element to them. A lot (Alot) of these are about some recent election thingy in this cold land that I live (Canada). So, here are some links, with a bit of commentary on each. Share and enjoy!

Speaking of which - The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has this to say on the subject of text adventure games: "As good a way to waste time as surfing in the Acid Pools of Agthrellion 6, text adventure games are exactly as productive. Also, in most such games, one wrong move spells disaster."

Fun sound board - This is a sweet synthesizer, and seriously, every time I rediscover this bookmark, I waste another 20 minutes making sweet digital music.

The untold story of the 2011 election - A fascinating read about how the conservatives had a better PR machine, how the liberals shot themselves in the foot, and how the NDP was the real winner in the election.

Perhaps a bit alarmist - but a good lesson on why having people who know nothing about technology try and regulate it is a very silly idea.

Evidence about how broken our election system currently is - and what the results should have looked like.

Warrant-less Online Tracking  - seriously, is there no better alternative to technologically inept legislators passing legislation on technology?

We could have the ISPs do it... - that's not better.

Well the ISP's have to be involved... - just... just stop. Please.

This kitty has a rifle. Better? - Much better.

Well that came off as a bit rant-y. Next time: comedy!

This will be short and sweet...

It's been a while, and I've been wanting to get back to blogging. Apparently you can do this from your phone now? We are living in the future!
Ps. Yes, I wrote this post from my phone, just because I could.

Blog 2: Electric Blogaloo

It is a struggle to find the right balance for a piece of writing - how serious or humorous; how personal or anonymous; how down to earth or whimsical. My first post was filled with outrageous shenanigans, so today, I will bounce away from the humorous and whimsical to a more serious and personal tone.

I want to murder a lot of people.

I feel that I can safely blame it on (the rain... yeah yeah... - shout out to Milly Vanilly fans) this cold. And when I say 'cold', I mean 'the sickness wherein my body attempts to separate itself by means of coughing and hacking parts of me through my throat and sinuses; to say nothing of the headaches and fatigue that this creates'. While spending the last few days as a quarantined shut-in has been super, I felt like I needed to get some supplies today.

Mustering up every ounce of strength and sanity I had left, I promptly... got a ride with my mom to the local Safeway. Shut up; I'm sick. The actual shopping part was not so bad, as the aisles are nearly empty during the day proper. The real challenge came at checkout time.

Naturally, there were exactly 3 aisles (of 12) open. Scratch the express lane, and I had to make a choice between seemingly similar lines. I chose... poorly.

For whatever reason, the people in front of me had their 11 or so items (why they didn't go to the express lane boggles my mind slightly) spread across the entirety of the conveyor belt. Which shouldn't be a problem, except that the cashier wasn't using the belt. He was just reaching out to grab stuff. Until my realization, I was upset at the couple in front of me. Then I discovered the nature of my true enemy: Register Jockey Stretch Armstrong.

In my dazed state, I decided not to say anything for fear of it sounding like the ramblings of a mad man. Hence the blog post.

So, I hand Mr. Armstrong my reusable bags; not because I care about the environment, but because they are easier to carry on the bus and whatnot; and he goes to work. Slowly. S l o w l y . Maybe it was some combination of the symptoms, but it felt like it took him half an hour to bag 2 bags. Reaching over the belt to pick up the next random item he decides belongs in next. Two or three tries to scan it. Slowly placing it in the bag. Side note- in what universe do you put bananas in the bag at the near bottom?

Anyways, all of this is to say that I finally have some NyQuill (and DayQuil). Capital N, little y, big fuckin Q.

This was slightly longer (and more boring) than I had hoped it would be. Here's a picture of a bear to compensate:

Side note 2: Which bear is best?

Share and enjoy!

Day 1: You awaken on an island. There is a broken boat beside you...

It's finally happened.

I've been waiting for this, teasing, hoping, wishing, dreaming for it to happen. After so long, growing weary with anticipation. But this dog's day has finally arrived.

I have begun my epic blogquest.



Also? Em Effing Double Down Time. Bitches.

In honor of my blog, I am consuming a handheld heart attack. "Ha ha ha ha" he hollered, hands held high in the heat of his home. Sorry, I sometimes vomit alliteration.

So I'm not really a fan of this color scheme, but what can you expect? They asked me to pick a template, these were the names of the choices:

• Simple
• Picture Window
• Watermark
• Ethereal
• Travel
• Awesome Inc.

What did they think I would pick?

Update: They didn't wrap this double down in a wrapper. Which I think is needed. Because, you know, the grease and whatnot.

Still, its pretty dang delicious.

You hear a noise ahead of you from behind the bushes. You are likely to be eaten by a grue. Obvious exits are NORTH and WEST.

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